Beauty That Turns A Man To Stone....Haiku for You

Medusa, you are

misconceived in your glory

they only see ill.

I see you in there.

With your star like qualities,

you blow them away.

Crumbling and cracking,

when their eyes meet with your own.

Turns a man to stone.

Your beauty unseen,

they cant love you if they look

for what lies beneath.

Close your eyes sweetness,

pray for a blind man to see

you in your true self.

Open them again

the snakes still writhe in your hair

No longer hidden.

Your lover can't see.

Or you'll turn that man to stone.

May as well give up.

Let him only touch

that which you want him to see.

Or it will end him.

No more love for you.

Too bad for you Medusa.

Your eyes tell the truth.

Shit My Mom Says..Mondays

You're not using my ashtray for a fucking ashtray! What's wrong with you?    
 -sorry mom, I thought that's what its for.  It's a really cool ashtray though, more art than function but still, its a fucking ashtray.

I put the lizard in the bathroom and you'll never guess where I found him....in the shower bless his little heart.
-yup, figure that one out on your own peeps. The lizard is obviously too fucking cold to do anything but lay around in the shower stall and wait to get captured.  He could have maybe made his grand escape if he'd only got up to the toilet....but then I'd have got the late night call that we were going to have to come help her search the pipes for her lizard.

I don't mind scratching your dog's ass, cuz he can't reach it, but really he's got to stop looking at me like that.  Don't you ever scratch his ass for him?
-nope, I leave that for y'all two's quality time when you come to visit mom.




HAPPY FUCKING MONDAY!!!

Friday

Fucking Friday,

It's my Friday.

Just got to get through this last day, Friday.

Freaky Friday,

It's my Friday.

Clean the kitchen and cook dinner Friday.

Fantabulous Friday,

It's my Friday.

Gonna get home tonight and freak him Friday.

Fuck, it's Friday.

Good fucking Friday,

Only got two days left to pull an Easter Bunny out of my ass Friday.

Fuck Friday.

Be good to me Friday.

I let you sneak up on me and surprise me Friday.

Happy Friday

It feels like a Good Friday.

Get off the computer and go to work Friday.

HAIKUS FOR U

It hurts me to live.

In a body so painful.

I wish I was free.

How do I do it?

I'm from a different mold.

You wonder don't you.

I can't go with you.

I can't walk the frozen lake.

I'm someone's mama.

untitled mad, does my anger stink or something?

Dear coworkers, unsuspecting probably innocent customers as well as the ones who deserve what I give,

   We all have our bad days, and today is one of mine.  I'm sorry that when I come to work 15 minutes early, it's not to jump on the floor and start taking tables.  It's because I was soooo sick of my life outside of work, that coming here was the only other place to go and so I left for here earlier than usual.  I'm just gonna sit out here in my fucking beat up ass hooptie and see how many cigarettes I can chain smoke in 15 minutes.  It takes more than makeup to give me this hustle face I put on for your viewing pleasure.  My cellophane smile is fueled by nicotine and redbulls.

    Now, I know that you are used to the Fick in a lady suit who works so well with you all and is always so bright and cheery.  Well today you are getting a good look at the real me.  And even though I still flash this smile and bat my eyes trying to make my tips and am the picture of a super-ninja-jedi-perfectly polite waitress, somehow, there are a few of you who see through to the pissed off she-dragon lurking under this skin.  I suppose of course this is because coworkers are like another family and regulars who just sit around watching me work all the time can tell the difference in my attitudes even when I'm fakin it to make it.    I also have a very expressive face and so some of the shit I'm thinking and trying my best not to let come spewing out of my mouth like fire can be read there by those of you who know me or just happen to be looking.  If you've read some of the earlier bitchings of mine, you'll know that I think a lot of shit that I cant say for need for gainful employment.

   However it may be, you all fucking know when I'm having an off day; its like you smell it.  Let me say thanks for noticing but don't fucking ask and do not assume and just give me advice on whatever problem it is that you think I have. I can't really tell you all the shit I got in my soul.  And half the time, I don't even know what the fuck my problem is.  I try to leave it in the hooptie with my cigarette butts and redbull cans.  I try to come in and have the easiest shift I can run so that I have no hang ups getting the fuck out of here when its quitting time.  

    And it isn't always whatever I left at the door that sets my horns growing, half the time it's some bullshit going on here that has me just pissy. Maybe its you, dumb ass.  Maybe you are the one I need to kick in the lips.  I fucking work HARD.  I fucking feed people for a living.  I know you need a menu you bastard, can your fat ass finish sitting down first?  Can I put this mother fucking water down before I pass it to you?  God, if you were my kid I'd eyeball you so bad right now you'd put yourself in time out.  If you just walked into my busy restaurant with only one waitress on duty (the fantabulous me of course, but I only got 2 arms), and you walk past all the clean tables to park your ass at a dirty god damned table, you are setting yourself up for me to instantly hate your guts.  I have to now fit bussing said dirty table, while you sit there and put your elbows all in someone else's crumbs, into my already too long list of shit people need from me.  You got your nerve pointing out the spot I missed with my towel or the shit on the floor.  You picked this shitty table when all the ready to be waited on tables watched you pass them by.  Don't complain its too wet now that I've fucking washed it like I was supposed to do!

    Little old bitch, ya you.  Might I have a word?  If you bring your ass in my fucking restaurant and tell me you are in a hurry, you better fucking be strapped for time.  After you ask me ten zillion and fuckin six questions about every thing on the menu and interrupt me eleven times while I'm trying to tell you the answers to eight of them, I wonder why your mama didn't take you for a ride down by the lake when you were little. Seriously, how the fuck did you get so old being such a fucking pain in the ass?  I know you've got to be single huh.  Who the fuck could stand you?  You are stupidity in a bag of wrinkles.  And when you are still at my table an hour later, now I'm taking it personal.  You are lingering in my section.  You are squatting.  Your food is gone.  You were in a rush and now you're not.  You chased down the other waitress in another section to try and get your order taken because of the rush you were in and I came directly to get it like I'd tried to do 999 times already since you got here, and you turn to the people who are with you and say, " well have you decided yet?" lady, you're gonna get bit by a beast messing with me, I thought you was fucking ready!! You with all your questions: "well which soup do you like best?", "how old is the cheesecake?", "would you eat it?"; and all your shit "I'm such a poor old lifetime student, I can only leave you a buck for all your troubles", "I'm a struggling student."   Lady,  I hate you like I hate so few people in this world.  You like fucking with me. I want to shake the shit out of you and look for a new job tomorrow.  All the annoying ass people like you are sooo lucky that I have younglings at home who depend on me or I would snatch you up.

    So in closing, let me again say thank you to everyone who gives a fuck if I'm ok or not.  It means a lot to know you care and I appreciate all the shit you do to help me out when it gets assed out crazy in here and I need to smoke and pee.  I'm proud of the teamwork we put out while on shift together slinging coffee and burgers to the masses.  I'm glad to know that you all recognize what I do for you and and return the favors to me when you can.  I'm glad that there are those of you ladies I work with who will take the really bad customers for me because you know how detrimental they are to this dragon temper of mine.  I really do love you.  Thankyou for always trying to cheer me up if I'm sad, calm me down if I'm pissed, help me out if I'm in the bushes, and cover my ass if I'm having a nic-fit.   And all my regulars who I love too.  Y'all don't all know me well, even if this is a bitty ass town, but you all think the best of me.  That means a lot when I sometimes think so little of myself.

Sincerely,

Fickwillium

     

What's Ur Name

Why is every fucking thing under the sun my fault?
What's ur name?
Mama.
Well that's why dumbass.

Ook! An Ode

Last year in the summer,

when the sky was blue
my children were growing

and a mama's heart was turning  blue too.

There came a little brown ball of fur

that was sweet and bitty 

and needed me to be her mama.

I gave her all her shots.

I took her out side to pee.

And when I ate my lifesavers,

she'd eat the orange ones for me.

My vicious bitch. 

A shedragon's mama dawg.

You watched over my horde.

She slept with my babies,

and kept them warm.

She started a lot of shit,

took a lot of them too.

And when I laid down each night,

She'd be like "mom, I'm comin wit u".

You zigged when you shoulda zagged

Ookla my baby girl. 

It was over so fast, 

we woke up, got out of bed

and when I let you outside

within 5 minutes, 

you left my world.

I run a pack, 

I am the alpha.

And each loss I take

I feel it in my soul.

OOK! 

Get out the trash!

Ook!

Stop chewing on the baby's toy!

Ookla get off my blanket, I'm too hot.

And leave the big dogs alone!

OOK!

Mamas I'm sorry.  I'll miss you with my heart.

You were only with me for a minute

but in this pack's life you played your part.

So skip through fields now and stay off of Heaven's highways.

If you see old Oogla the Beast,

beware he was the meanest. Thats how you got your name!

And if you see old Sho'Nuff, 

have fun he was such a lover!

Dig holes, Chew God's slippers,

and visit my babies in their dreams.

Shit My Mom Says..Mondays

• "Stop playing with your food!  You can't ride the bus if you smell like ham."   She was talking to Muffin but I'm thinking this should actually be posted at the bus stop.
• "My therapist asked me to say the first thing that comes to mind.  Her first one was Barack Obama.  I said green kool aid"     How the fuck did you put those two together mom?

     HAPPY FUCKING MONDAY EVERYONE FROM ME N MY MAMA!

spillagefromwithin.blogspot.com

Zachariah

Happy Birthday Little Man. I love you.

A Random Thought...

  It might be a little late, but how come Shel Silverstein didn't get arrested for publishing an ad to sell his little sister, who was obviously a minor at the time?

Imitation Is the Sincerest Form of Flattery

I see her,

she cant do like me.

She may walk and talk and strut,

like me.

But in the dark,

where the truth lies

she will never be 

like me.

I don't have to check myself,

hitch my pants

 or tighten my bra straps.

And I don't need 

no damned mirror,

to see

me.

All I gotta do is look

over there,

and some girls

tryna be

like me.

Thats My Daughter...

Thank you Lord for the beautiful blessings you've given me in my children.  They are the light that shines through me.  My arrows.  My daughters...  Keep them safe in your arms forever more.

Daianna Rae

you are my ray of sunshine.

Amari Daizionae'

baby girl you light up my world.

"Love me or hate me, both are in my favor.  If you love me, I'll always be in your heart....If you hate me I'll always be in your mind"    ~Shakespeare 

O Nonna, Whats Her Name?

O Nonna,

Pretty Princess Punkin Pie

Hey Jude

Twisted Sister

Nonna Rae

Dai Dai

Rebugga Sue

na na na nananana nananana hey Jude.

You! Come're I'm talkin to you!

Go Then

what cracks me up the most

is how you profess to not need me.

you left and took your shit

but lots of that shit was mine....

you tried to give some back,

but you forgot my movies,

my time,

and my piece of mind.

so while you so busy livin yo life

and not needing nothin from me,

remember you still got my shit

and that just like i've got by without it,

i'll get by without you.

guess what!

i killed the spider above my bed.

i chopped kindling and started the fire.

i fed, watered, untangled, and played with the dogs.

i bathed my babies and did they hair.

i paid all of the bills.

i did all of the shopping.

i cussed that mothafucka out and stood up for myself.

i fixed the toilet.

i changed the tire.

guess what nigga!

i don't need you.

neva crackin unda pressure even tho pressure crack pipes.  my bitch got my back whether i'm wrong or i'm right.
she hates my guts.  she makes me sick. i fuckin caint stand tha bitch.

just me n my bitch....fuckin love e40

Alone

Till now, I always survived on my own.  I never really cared until I met you.
I miss him.  Wish he'd come home.  I'm alone and blue.
Wonder does he miss me to...